The Roses

 So, what do you think of when I bring up The War of the Roses?

Do you think of that one war between two English Royal Houses? Do you think of that one movie that Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner did with Danny DeVito in 1989? Or do you think of that one novel by Warren Adler that sourced the aforementioned movie?

I'll bet when you watch Jay Roach's take on the novel, simply titled The Roses, you'll think of the older movie. Is Tony McNamara's loose adaptation just as funny as Michael J. Leeson's faithful approach for the 1989 film? Is it funny, period? Let's take a look.

Theo (Benedict Cumberbatch) & Ivy Rose (Olivia Colman) are the couple that most would envy. He's a successful architect, and she's an aspiring chef who's also a successful stay-at-home mom. He eventually buys her a lot for a restaurant, which she calls We've Got Crabs! Everything changes when the storm of the century hits; his dream Nautical Museum falls pathetically to pieces, while her restaurant hits it big thanks to a visiting food critic (Caroline Partridge).

A few years later, he's the stay-at-home dad and she's the breadwinner. This new arrangement slowly, but surely, drives them apart with resentment. They try to hide it with playful banter, but everyone immediately sees the writing on the wall. It takes a memorable jog before Theo finally decides to divorce Ivy. Problem is, neither of them want to part with their smart house. Will someone blink in this War of the Roses, or will they destroy each other? I'll bet you know the answer already.

But you'll have to wait a while for the "festivities." It's 102-minutes long, and the war officially kicks off about an hour in. Theo & Ivy partake in childish pranks, most of which are told in a montage. Their attorneys, Barry (Adam Samberg) & Eleanor (Allison Janey), have an entertaining verbal sparring session. It gets pretty nasty in the climax, when both sides resort to all-out attempted murder. The last few seconds all but spells out their fate, a memorable "oops" moment if I've ever seen one. All the fun of the older movie in this one's last half-hour. "Where's the fun in that?" you might ask.

An answer might be how it eviscerates the whole "till death you part" thing. Their friends, including the aforementioned Barry and his wife Amy (Kate McKinnon), point out the obvious tensions. Their marriage counselor, Janice (Belinda Bromilow), deems their marriage unsalvageable after one session. Their kids, Hattie & Roy (Hala Finley & Wells Rappaport), applaud them for finally pulling the plug. Naturally, the film doesn't think highly of obviously contentious couples. If divorce is a parachute, then the Roses should hurry up and use it yesterday. I mean, they had their chance. Several, actually...

The Roses start off as pretty good parents and partners. As the film went on, however, I found myself siding with Ivy way more than Theo. She, at least, tries to be sympathetic to him, but he counters with needlessly cruel jabs (particularly when he finally starts the divorce). We can sympathize with him - when we're not laughing profusely - when the museum collapse goes viral. We can also slightly sympathize with him when Ivy slanders him with AI. But his climactic attempt to kill Ivy with food allergies renders their reconciliation a little flat. It's admittedly fun to watch Cumberbatch act like a petulant brat, though. He and Colman get some marvelous insults, so there's some levity there.

What else do we have here? Ivy's skills in pastry architecture are nothing less than outstanding. You got to see her house cake, at least until she throws it around during a contentious dinner party. I don't know who actually made the dishes, whether it was Colman or someone else on the staff, but they were appealing (ignore some "extra" ingredients). Their smart house looks pretty nice, thanks to production designer Mark Ricker. Its opening credits, set to a cover of Happy Together, are visually imaginative. Finally, Theodore Shapiro adds to the soundscape with an exquisite score.

It's an amusing deconstruction of marriage, even if it's not as vicious as its predecessor (I don't miss the older film's dinnertime surprise, though). I think some of the film's new gags are pretty good. I don't think the film's pathos is proficient, but it has some moments. Overall, it might be worth seeing this peculiar film even once. If it gets you to look at the older versions, then it's done something right.