The Cat in the Hat

 Universal hit it big in 2000 with Jim Carrey in How the Grinch Stole Christmas. But when they made Mike Myers The Cat in the Hat in 2003, practically nobody liked it. Dr. Seuss’s estate promptly forbade any more live-action adaptations of his work because of it.

Universal got a chance with The Lorax, and another with The Grinch, both times animated. And now, it’s Warner Bros.’ turn with The Cat, this time with Bill Hader voicing said feline. It’s a decent time, indeed.

The Cat in the Hat is employed by the Institute for the Institution of Imagination and Inspiration to cheer up kids on rainy days. He leaves them satisfied and destruction in his wake. His boss, Mr. Hoogeboom, wants him out, but Sherri from HR (Quinta Brunson) persuades him to give the Cat one last case. 

This time, he’s sent to cheer up Gabby (Xochitl Gomez) and Sebastian (Tiago Martinez), who have just moved with their mom, Carmen (America Fererra), to a new town. The Cat brings with him a Go-Backer, a stopwatch that reverses time around its users - perfect for fixing messes. Gabby decides to fix her move with it, but it falls into one of her family’s three moving boxes. The Cat and the Kids travel by couch to find which box it is.

Oh yeah, there’s also a Something, a monstrous thing that wants the Go-Backer like it’s the One Ring. They’ll have to hurry up and find the Go-Backer before it, Mr. Hoogeboom, or the kids’ new landlady, Patty (Paula Pell), make things worse.

Since the book is so short, directors & writers Erica Rivinoja & Alessandro Carloni naturally had to find some way to expand the plot. Besides the whole Institute business, they do so with clever sight gags and inspired bits of silliness. Their emotional through line, however, is mostly slight and surface level stuff. For example, Gabby’s apprehension with the move just boils down to “I hate it here.” Did she have any friends she misses from the old town? It improves, though, after Patty threatens to flush the kids’ sentient goldfish, Waffles (Matt Berry). Now those are palpable stakes. 

I also have issues with the villains. Admittedly, Giancarlo Esposito’s clearly having fun playing Mr. Hoogeboom as a dastardly bad guy. He’s a law-abiding jerk, much like Patty, as he points out the Cat’s selfish thrill seeking. But in another twist, it turns out that he might have taken one of The Cat’s past incidents out of context. That never gets brought up, for he instead gets his comeuppance off-screen. Patty, meanwhile, has a change of heart that would be ludicrously quick in any other film. Granted, the catalyst is also silly, but it’s still horrifying if you dig deeper.

Now, what about The Cat? He may be loud, and a little oblivious, but he’s surprisingly pleasant to be around. He may be messy, but at least he means well. The aforementioned plot twist gives him another meaningful surprise. He’s matched by Waffles, who has most of the film’s funniest dialogue. They meet some weird characters in the box worlds, but the most significant one is a “Psychic Narwhal” (Titus Burgess). More memorable are The Cat’s Institute colleagues, which include Pig in a Wig (Ryan Gaffney), Gary the rich Intern (Bowen Yang), Rat with a Bat, and especially Sherri from HR. 

Oh yeah, let’s not forget the Things, who number everywhere but 2 (there is a reason for that). Their character designs, along with everyone else's, are delightfully eclectic. No one thing looks like another. The Things’ slaphappy communication is surprisingly tolerable.

Its strongest asset is its artistic styles. The Institute and its residents are rendered in cel-shaded CGI, while the real world is rendered in “normal” CGI. It’s an interesting contrast, to say the least. Its best gag has The Cat come into a monochrome house, presumably the same one in the book, only to find the kids glued to their tablets (great satire). The house brightens up when he gets to work; they even love the messy aftermath. There’s some great production design in each world, with a favorite being the Institute's massive supply closet.

All things considered, this Cat in the Hat isn’t likely to make the Geisels roll in their graves. If anything, it's greatest sin might be that it might not mean much beyond a rainy-day matinee. I still had fun watching it, and I'd rather take its sense of humor beyond its 2003 predecessor's crass one. I'd say that's all folks, but there's something else:

It kicks-off with a new Looney Tunes short, Daffy Season, in which Daffy (Eric Bauza, posthumous) desperately tries to get his soccer-obsessed co-stars (mostly Jeff Bergman) that it's Duck Season. Its rough art-style works best when it pivots to comedic horror, while Bauza and the other voice actors are entertaining as always. You'll just have to see it for yourself.

Now, That's All Folks!

Godzilla Minus Zero

 Godzilla Minus One not only brought its franchise some of its best reviews, but its first ever Academy Award. Naturally, everybody expected a sequel, and it’s finally here with Godzilla Minus Zero. Do you want to know more?

Of course, you do!

Anyway, it opens with Japan already under attack, not from Godzilla, but by Ghidorah, a giant dragon that shoots lightning. Professor Murakami (Min Tanaka) and his assistant, Akira Hagiwara (Kou Maehara), narrowly survive the attack. They join up with Dr. Noda (Hidetaka Yoshioka) and his Kaiju Response Team to help deal with the thing.

Koichi Shikishima (Ryunosuke Kamiki), the hero of the last Godzilla War, is called back to action against Ghidorah. Unfortunately, their first strike mutates it into the three-headed King Ghidorah, who can also bend gravity to its will. If that wasn’t bad enough, Godzilla resurfaces. 

Fortunately, Murakami plans to make them fight, so they’d have one less Kaiju to deal with. A key part of his plan is Noriko (Minami Hamabe), Koichi’s now-wife, who narrowly survived Godzilla’s attack on Ginza. Since she’s now partially mutated with Godzilla’s DNA, Murakami plans to hook her up to a sonar machine to call him out. Unfortunately, Murakami has ulterior motives for his strategy.

Takashi Yamazaki, who once again directs, writes and supervises the visual effects, keeps Godzilla out of the action until more than fifty minutes in. In the meantime, we get plenty of human drama and Ghidorah action. The drama might not appeal to everyone, but the human ensemble, both new and returning characters, are so compelling that I didn’t mind. The action is just as intense as Minus One, particularly a dogfight where Koichi and his fellow airmen try to spear Ghidorah with lightning rods. It doesn’t work, but at least they damaged him.

It’s nice to watch Koichi and Noriko bond with their adopted daughter, Akiko (Sae Nagatani). They feel like an actual family, and it’s made more compelling by what they faced last time. Indeed, the threat of Akiko losing her new parents to Godzilla, directly or not, hangs over her every time they leave her with Sumiko (Sakura Ando), who now runs a war orphanage. Her seemingly being left behind one final time is simply the most agonizing scene in the whole movie. While Koichi’s reluctance to fight Ghidorah initially struck me as stubborn, we see that he does have valid concerns. His family’s safety, meanwhile, is sufficient reason for him to fight.

Amongst the returning cast, there’s the delightfully quirky Noda, whose contentious relationship with Koichi provides some more drama. It’s hard to feel nothing when he gives his life at the end. His former crewmates, Shiro Mizushima (Yuki Yamada) and Seiji Akitsu (Kuranosuke Sasaki), don’t get much to do, but they’re fine. 

Makoto Aoyama (Masami Nagasawa), a forecaster on Noda’s team, is one of the more significant new characters. She has some lingering trauma over a failed weather prediction, but she still proves her mettle here. The thematic overlap between her subplot and this year’s Pressure would make them an interesting double feature. We also have two compelling characters, Shoichi Honda (Kai Inowaki) & Heikichi Tokiwa (Eita Okuno), who turn out to be Red Shirts, which is disappointing.

The real supporting MVP is Tanaka as Murakami. He’s introduced as Dr. Exposition, the cool old man not unlike the 1954 film’s Dr. Yamane (Takashi Shimura). Once we discover his backstory as not only a survivor of Hiroshima, but Ginza, his mental fortitude starts to crack. He lapses into mad scientist territory when he envisions siccing Godzilla on New York, but snaps back with horror within seconds. That is perhaps the best acting in the entire franchise on either side of the Pacific. 

Yamazaki and his Shirogumi colleagues were allowed to aim higher for this sequel. I already mentioned the Ghidorah dogfight, but then we have the follow-up, where Koichi flies through much of Matsumoto as the newly crowned King has it floating. Ghidorah’s evolution from a space blob to Westeros transplant, to three-headed monster, is an interesting one. While he and Godzilla don’t meet until the finale, their big battle is well worth the wait. That fight gets really gruesome, and along with Murakami’s flashbacks and daydream, it cements its franchise first R-Rating. The gruesome makeup work ought to earn it consideration this year, even if it’s just at the bake-off. 

What else do we have? It’s a nice and loud film, with thundering sound effects, Naoki Sato’s returning score and his re-orchestrations of Akira Ifukube’s trademark theme, emanating from the speakers. While they drown out the dialogue at times, it’s fortunately still subtitled. While there’s some obvious CGI here, like with King Ghidorah’s coronation, they don’t detract from the greater whole. Having the final battle be in the ruins of Ginza gives production designer Anri Jojo his greatest canvas.

Overall, if you're going to watch Godzilla Minus Zero, do it now on the biggest screen you can find. It's a spectacular showcase for not just Godzilla, but the most compelling human ensemble he's ever been with. This and Minus One are proof that lightning can strike twice cinematically. The only thing that could stop it from winning another Oscar is its admittedly bountiful competition. In any case, I'll be waiting for a sequel when Yamazaki or Toho is ready for it. I've said enough about this one.

Fresh Meat

 Fresh Meat played for one night only last month and went to streaming soon after. This was produced by James A. Janisse of the YouTube channel Dead Meat, whose signature show, The Kill Count, recaps horror films and tallies up their victims. And now, he’s given the spotlight to thirteen lucky filmmakers and their shorts.

In the framing device, SATE THE SCREEN (Dir. Janisse), an evil freezer at a butcher shop plays horror shorts for Jessica (Elle Riot Fox) as long as it’s fed fresh meat. Once its screen starts up, we’re presented a block of at least three shorts. Her father (Janisse) is willing to do anything to keep it going. It’s a bit tedious waiting through this to get to the shorts, but trust me, it gets to a nifty - and disturbing - destination. So, what about these shorts?

BLOCK 1

EARWORM (Dir. Benjamin Baraad) - Reed (Miles Flower) watches a viral video of a woman playing the piano after she commits filicide. He’s soon haunted by the ghastly tune. This is a great start for the selection, thanks to its eerie soundmix and sustained paranoia. It all pays off with a shocking ending. You’ll definitely feel bad for Reed all the way through.

YOU’LL BE FINE (Dir. Sarah Stephens) - As Sam & Katy’s (Chris Mayers & Stephens) marriage falls apart, what else can go wrong? A zombified intruder, that’s what! I didn’t even notice this was shot in a oner until I dug deep into it. I guess I was too engrossed with the plot to take heed; Katy's plight is that compelling. The ending is as unnerving as it is a bit bewildering.

THE WITCHENING (Dir. MK Kopp) - One night, Jeanie (Penelope Martone) shows her babysitter Kate (Kiarra Hamagami Goldberg) a witch’s jawbone. Kate doesn’t think much of it, until the “Bone Witch” herself (Malevolence, the makeup designer) shows up. The Bone Witch is simply the best designed monster in the lineup; somebody get this Malevolence on a feature! The humans are fine, the violence is creatively disturbing, and the abrupt ending is still creepy.

BLOCK 2

CLOSING HOUR (Dir. Tim Smink) - In this animated short, we follow a nameless gas station cashier arguing with her boyfriend. A masked killer follows him there, but the Jason-wannabe isn’t the monster that our heroine should fear. Just imagine The Thing in animation, and you have this short. The monster is made all the creepier with its rotoscoped animation, which is an interesting choice in this day and age. Its shocking swerve makes it my favorite of the bunch. 

WHY DID YOU STOP ME? (Dir. Vichay Tek) - Officer Thomas (Dan Thomas) records a late-night traffic stop; the woman (Rachel Nichole Tek) isn’t who she appears to be. This is the most delightfully creepy of the shorts, thanks to its bleak cinematography and Tek’s unnerving performance. Who or what she is isn’t spelled out, but we get enough to know she’s not friendly. Its style reminded me of Resident Evil, which is a welcome point-of-comparison. 

THE WAY I FEEL (Dir. Joshua Chislett) - Bereaved parents Andi (Emily Bettie) & Reed (Dragomir Rabrenovic) mind meld in order to help each other process their grief. Andi gets a lot more than she bargained for when she realizes that Reed is evil. This is probably the short most deserving of its own feature, thanks to its interesting concept. It could also benefit from an expanded narrative; here, it just rushes through the answers. It’s still cool watching Andi assert herself against Reed. Well, that’s what I felt about that.

BLOCK 3 

KOKO: THE INVISIBLE DOG (Dir. Haiku) - A Japanese family adopts an invisible dog, Koko. One day, Koko starts eating people, beginning with her family. This is the most upsetting of the shorts, considering that I’ve worked with dogs for years, many of whom indeed can get randomly violent. The first-person cinematography and sound design are effective, for sure. But I was begging for the next short to start sooner. 

TCHOTCHKE (Dir. Finn Bell & Ethan Droze) - A guy buys a creepy clown piggybank, and is haunted by an equally creepy clown ghost (Aidan Armstrong is both). The clown drives its owner to sell all of his Earthly possessions to feed its need for coins. Its editing is the most proficient of the shorts; it really helps getting us into its guy’s deteriorating headspace, along with Armstrong’s performance. It feels like something Edgar Allan Poe would write. It does get especially nasty in the end, where we also see some of its seams. But overall, this is another short I’d like to see with its own feature.

JINX (Dir. Jonnie Stapleton) - A couple with perfect synergy (Rachel Williamson & Stapleton) find themselves unable to break rank one night. Even worse, the jinx is infectious. Their synergy is cute, until it’s not, but it’s still funny to watch. That sums up the short in a nutshell.

BLOCK 4

WHAT’S IN YOUR BAG? (Dir. Bela Baptiste) - Dolly Lewis, star of the TV show Sight Unseen, is featured on the titular show, where she presents the contents of her handbag. Things get creepy when she unveils her nightstick. This is the most bizarre short, owing to its ambiguity and sudden violence. Who is the random guy Dolly suddenly attacks? Is she a vigilante? Who are the people she brings the guy to? This short leaves you with so many questions.

DAGNABBIT! (Dir. Joshua David Matthews & Jason Sheedy) - Jim (Kyle Gazak) spends his days waiting for something to crawl out of his house so he can shoot it. Sleep, not the thing, is his worst enemy. It’s a live-action Looney Tunes short, only instead of a wabbit, it’s a multi-armed thing waiting behind that door. Jim’s daily routine is surprisingly interesting, while the reveal of the thing is perfectly unnerving. The ending is more goofy than horrific; still enjoyable.

PSYCHOPOMP (Dir. Brady Palubiski) - Selena (Andrea Orta) decides to take a ten-minute bus ride at a carnival. The only other passenger is a demonic Psychopomp (Jackson Palubiski) who wants to make her its next victim. While I haven’t seen any of Rob Zombie’s movies, its gritty tone and aggressive soundtrack reminded me of his works. The Psychopomp itself could easily fit in with the freaks in House of 1000 Corpses. If anything, it has one of the most unnerving, and most weirdly amusing, variations of a “it was just a dream, or was it?” ending I’ve ever seen. 

VAPE GLOW (Dir. Steven Schloss) - Mike (Samuel Dunning) is so addicted to his vape pen that he uses it as a flashlight when the power goes out. That’s when he encounters an addicted zombie. Mostly shot from the Vape Pen’s POV, this short provides its audience with a healthy serving of satire. Its cruel twist ending is more bemusing than upsetting. All in all, this is the second weirdest short of the bunch.

Do any of these shorts sound appealing to you? If not, I think I might have something up my hat next time.

Wicker

Are you in the mood for a most unusual love story? A recent one, perhaps? Try Wicker, in which film-making couple Eleanor Wilson & Alex Huston Fischer visualize Ursula Wills’ short story The Wicker Husband into cinematic form.

Once upon a time, there was a village where men were mostly defined by their job, and the women by their men. There, a Fisherwoman (Olivia Colman) lives alone, much to her neighbors’ disgust. They don’t take kindly to her being single, nor her fishy wares. One day, she commissions the local Basket Weaver (Peter Dinklage) to weave her a husband. A month later, she finds herself with a brand new, fully autonomous, Wicker Husband (Alexander Skarsgard).

This Wicker Man is so devoted to his wife that he inadvertently puts all the other husbands to shame. That’s easy considering that his marriage is the only happy one in town. The Tailor’s Wife (Elizabeth Debicki) hates the Fisherwoman’s newfound happiness so much that she schemes to destroy it. Her sister (Marli Siu) ends up being her unwilling accomplice in said scheme. Will this marriage last?

This “fable” doesn’t concern itself with how the magic works. The Basket Weaver just works, and his creations just live. It’s just an accepted part of life for the village, just like how brides are adorned with metallic dog-collars on their wedding (yikes). In fact, it gets plenty of mileage mocking how regressive this village is. It makes it all the better when the Basket Weaver gives them a nasty surprise at the end.

And yet, it’s a love story just as endearing as The Shape of Water. Colman’s Fisherwoman is an insecure loner who’d like to be happy as everyone else. She’s so insecure that she finds it easier to believe the bad than the good, something she admits. And yet, Skarsgard’s Wicker Husband is so incapable of negativity that nothing, not even being burned alive, changes that. They were literally made for each other. The high and low points of their marriage will keep you invested during its 105-minutes. Believe me, there’s plenty of each.

Meanwhile, we have the Tailor’s Wife, who is so entertainingly malicious, and yet surprisingly pitiable. Her sister, meanwhile, is thoroughly sympathetic throughout the story. And then, there is the Basket Weaver, who’s also the film’s narrator. His droll slyness is invaluable, whether on-scren or in voiceover. His nasty surprise is his best moment. Who else do we have in this village?

There’s The Tailor’s Wife’s Father (Richard E. Grant), the town quack, who’s rather amusing. His son-in-law, the Bottlewasher (Gustav Lindh), is a good man who tries to shape up. The Tailor (Nabhaan Rizwan) is indifferent to his wife’s feelings, but he’s a saint compared to the Butcher (Phil Daniels). The Baker (Ben Ashenden) has an unusual plan to save his sterile marriage (Ella Bruccoleri is his wife), which only confuses the Wicker Husband and himself. Finally, there’s the Innkeeper & his wife (Kiell Smith-Bynoe & Emily Lloyd-Saini), who are just fine.

Besides Skarsgard’s performance, the Wicker Husband is also a technical triumph. Between the sound design and Oscar-worthy makeup work, this Wicker Man looks and feels real. The only visual effects on him were digital lighting, but good luck finding the seams. The production and costume designs make this a perfectly gritty fairy tale world. If that’s not to your liking, try Lol Crawley’s cinematography for its splendid, season-spanning scenery. And finally, there’s Anna Meredith’s haunting, yet enchanting score, to set the moods.

What makes Wicker an especially appealing fable is its moral perseverance. It's all about two people who try to stay good in such a cynical world, and whether it's worth doing so. In that sense, Wicker shares some excellent thematic company with Superman & Paddington. Those might be odd comparisons, but Wicker is a delightfully odd film. What else can I say but check it out? I’ve said enough.

Clayface

I had a sudden stomach bug last week, so I couldn’t get around to watching Clayface for Halloween. Now that it’s mostly gone, it’s finally time to see Batman’s messiest rogue make his film debut, courtesy of writers Mike Flanagan & Hossein Amini and director James Watkins.

Matt Hagen (Tom Rhys Harries) is Gotham City’s biggest movie star and newly minted Oscar nominee. At a party, Matt dances the night away with Mia Torrez (Joana Ribeiro), the dame of Gotham’s nastiest mob boss, Markos Szabo (David Denick). When Szabo catches them, he and his goons carve up Matt’s face. Everything else soon goes wrong for Matt, and he’s left a destitute nobody in the slums.

Matt comes across Dr. Caitlyn Corr (Naomi Ackie) & her skin-repairing nanites, and volunteers for human trials. They work, for a solid minute, so he self-administers the whole supply at his follow-up. Soon enough, Matt can heal any injury and shapeshift into anyone, just as long as he’s emotionally stable. When he’s not, the results aren’t pretty. It’s also not pretty when Matt goes after everyone who ruined him, and anyone who might stop him.

Quite frankly, there’s a lot about Matt that should’ve been on the page and/or the stage. For one thing, we barely see his career before Szabo, not even the film that got him Oscar-nominated (whose title is barely audible). For another, and more important thing, Matt gets slandered when he tries to have Szabo prosecuted. What kind of allegations, other than Mia’s accusations, aren’t even acknowledged when Matt crashes a movie premiere. He’s just welcomed back now that he has a face (good points for satire, though). Better elaboration could’ve helped its point that, perhaps, Matt wasn’t that nice to begin with.

That’s not saying that Matt is a blank slate. Far from it, for Harries’s charismatic performance shapes Matt into quite the character. It’s easy to get behind Matt when the world sets him up to fail. It’s even easier to tremble when he starts fixating on Caitlyn, especially after he comes into his powers. And yet, even after he turns villainous, you’ll still feel a bit bad for him. His makeup work deserves a spot on the Oscar-bakeoff, if not the ballot itself.

As Caitlyn, Ackie is pretty good as a scientist in over her head. She’s got a sympathetic backstory behind her research, which gets explored fairly well. One of her few mistakes is not taking safety measures to prevent a self-administration, but that’s a surprisingly believable blunder. She’s otherwise professional, and she’s prepared to deal with Matt when it gets bad. Believe me, you’ll share her dread when he starts turning stalker, even during a sleep test. Overall, Ackie’s rather engaging in what could've been a routine role.

They’re surrounded by a decent supporting cast. Some of the highlights include Max Minghella as John Borelli, Caitlyn’s fiancé and the only Gotham cop on Matt’s side; Joshua James as Corey Bowery, Matt’s best bud; and Eddie Marsan as Frank Fitzpatrick, Matt’s treacherous manager. Mia, despite being rather vapid, still cares enough about Szabo’s henchman Patches (Jake Curran) when the boss shoots him and a disguised Matt. Pity she doesn’t have the same pity for Matt, or maybe that was written out (it’s plausible). Szabo, meanwhile, is decently monstrous. And finally, we have Vic Chissler (Rob Brydon), Gotham’s biggest talk show host, whom Matt briefly invokes as the devil on his shoulders (more or less).

Liverpool once again stands in for Gotham, just as it partially did in The Batman. While not as stunning as the earlier film, cinematographer Rob Hardy and production designer James Price get some good gritty mileage out of the city. A few highlights include Szabo's nightclub, as well as an ally where Matt ambushes one of Szabo's goons. There's some way obvious CGI for Matt's clayness, but there's also some excellent body horror in there, too. Jon Harris, who was Oscar-nominated for editing 127 Hours, pulls off some excellent tension when Matt cuts open his melting eyelids on a turbulent flight. If I have any complaint about Matt's final form, it's that it's smaller than I thought it would be. Other than that, it's a very pitiable creature, all things considered. As for music, we have another excellent Volker Bertelmann score, as well as a sudden dance scene that's surprisingly less weird than The Bride's. 

Overall, Clayface is an interesting spotlight for one of Batman's B-List rogues. While Batman isn't even mentioned, it ends with a confrontation between the two not only plausible, but potentially fascinating. He maybe one of Batman's most implausible enemies, but he and the Caped Crusader are psychologically matched. He's already a lead on the animated series Creature Commandos, so maybe they've already had a confrontation in that continuity. I'd still like to see whatever shape that confrontation takes. How's that for a first impression?

I've said enough.

Wildwood

Welcome back, Laika.

The studio’s first film in nearly a decade, Wildwood, has actually been in development ever since 2011, when the original novel by Colin Meloy of The Decembrists was published. That’s right, it’s been on the pipeline during most of Laika’s existence. And it was generally worth it.

Prue McKeel (Peyton Elizabeth-Lee), much like Laika itself, lives her days in Portland, Oregon. Her parents (Jake Johnson & Maya Erskine) give her two rules before they head off for the day - don’t take her baby brother, Mac (Arthur Knight, director Travis’s son), outside, and don’t go into the ominously named Impassable Wilderness. When Prue ignores the first rule, a murder of crows whisks away Mac. She and her classmate, Curtis Mehlberg (Jacob Tremblay), ignore the second to go after them.

The Wilderness, also called Wildwood, is populated by humans and talking animals alike. There’s war brewing between the forces of its exiled dowager governess, Alexandra (Carey Mulligan), and everyone else, which includes a community of bandits led by Brendan (Mahershala Ali), an Avian Principality led by Prince Owl Rex (Richard E. Grant), and a tribe of mystics led by Iphigenia (Tantoo Cardinal). Alexandra wants to use Mac for a ritual to awaken Wildwood’s extremely destructive Ivy. It’s up to Prue and Curtis to organize the disparate forces into a united front. That’s the gist of it.

If you’re already thinking “that sounds like a lot,” you’re right. Besides the aforementioned factions, there’s also the current governor, Lars (Marc Evan Jackson), and his scheming deputy, Roger (Jemaine Clement). Lars imprisons Prue for reasons, and it takes quite a while before he pops back in. Meanwhile, there’s a postmaster (Len Cariou) who seems to be a muggle, but there’s not much worldbuilding with him. Naturally, some of the rank-and-file characters don’t get much development before they’re offed. In short, even with its epic length of 132-minutes (the longest ever afforded to a stop-motion movie), it’s sometimes hard to keep up with everyone in these wildwoods.

On a related note, there’s also the Avian Principality’s General (Angela Bassett), an elegant golden eagle who is probably the best designed puppet here. Unfortunately, she’s unceremoniously killed off about halfway in. She was a cool character, but it’s disappointing that she wasn’t more so.

A few more substantial characters include Septima (Awkwafina), Curtis’s rat sidekick; Maksim (Tom Waits), Alexandra’s coyote general; and Dmitri (Charlie Day), the runt of Maksim’s corps. Septima and Dmitri have pretty good character arcs, while Maksim is a decently gruff co-antagonist. While the cast is obviously packed with celebrity voices, I barely recognized any of them until the credits. That even includes Awkwafina, which is surprising considering her extensive animation credits.

Between the two protagonists, I found Curtis’s arc the more compelling one. It’s remarkable how Curtis, the goofy sidekick, proves himself a bigger hero than either he or the audience could’ve given himself credit for. During his subplot, he wins over the bandits and is torn up when he’s forced to kill Maksim to save Prue. That’s not saying that Prue is boring, far from it. She does discover a dark secret concerning her and Mac’s origins, and she doesn’t take it well. That moment is expertly acted, both in puppet and vocal forms.

Alexandra is motivated by the loss of her son, both as a human and a soul-powered automaton, and her status. Her grief, which borders around suicidal and omnicidal, makes her one scary villain even at her most cordial. She doesn’t revel in her villainy, but she doesn’t see any path beyond it. A few viewers might get confused with her campaign, but I think it’s pretty clear cut.

Do you know what’s also pretty clear cut? The puppets themselves. I already discussed the General, but everyone here is a well-sculpted character. During its extensive crowd scenes, I started to forget that everyone present was a puppet. Their very fluid animations had me thinking some of them were CGI or even live actors! I don’t know why.

Granted, the murder of crows was CGI, but even their numbers were scanned from real puppets. As usual, the digital additions to its practical sets are well-integrated. It helps having cinematography veteran Caleb Deschanel photographing them. His crowning achievement here is its big final battle on par with The Lord of the Rings. You just need to see it for yourself.

Let’s not forget the music, shall we? Dario Marianelli’s elegant score is always prepared to fit each scene, while Meloy provides his creation with a neat end credits song. They’re all worth a listen.

Keep in mind that Wildwood is not only longer than an average stop-motion film, but also more violent. It certainly earns its PG-13 rating and then some. But it’s also an artistic marvel and rather interesting dual hero’s journey. It’s worth checking out at least once, even if you have to wait for home media (where most of Laika’s output has met its biggest audiences). I’ve said enough.

Sense and Sensibility

 Jane Austen movies are a serious business; they come over and over every decade, in forms obvious and discreet, and there’s no getting rid of them.

In Plain English, Jethro!

It’s time for another film of Sense and Sensibility, Jane Austen’s official debut as a novelist. Ang Lee’s 1995 film, whose star Emma Thompson also wrote its Oscar-winning screenplay, remains a gold standard of Austen films. Let’s see what director Georgia Oakley and screenwriter Diana Reid bring to the tale.

So, what would that be?

Here goes, Vance ...

Shortly after their dad’s death, the Dashwood sisters - Elinor (Daisy Edgar-Jones), Marianne (Esme Creed-Miles) and Margaret (Bodhi Rae Breathnach) - and their mother (Caitríona Balfe), lose their financial security to their elder half-brother John (Tom Brooke) and his scheming wife, Fanny (Stacy Martin). Since it’s not-so-jolly-old England, they have no means to protest their reversal of fortune. But they do have Mrs. Jennings (Fiona Shaw), who invites them over to stay over at Devonshire. They take the invite and head off.

At Devonshire, Marianne falls for both the brooding Col. Brandon (Herbert Nordrum) and the roguish Willoughby (Frank Dillane). Elinor, meanwhile, has feelings for Fanny’s nicer brother, Edward Ferrars (George Mackay), which they can’t publicly reciprocate for various reasons. As usual, they’ll have to sift through all the romantic entanglements before they can reach a happy ever after.

And what can they expect before then?

They can expect a delightful cast, headlined rather well by Elinor and Marianne’s sisterhood. They’re joyous to watch together, especially since they never tire of each other. Apart, you’ll definitely feel for them when they face their romantic entanglements. It’s especially endearing when Elinor helps care for Marianne when the latter falls ill. And yes, the happy ending is a nice reward.

As for Margaret, she gets involved in a cute running gag at the start, but she’s barely relevant to the plot, just as she was in the novel.

The only thing I had issue with Edward is his complicated entanglement with one Lucy Steele. There’s also the prolonged misunderstanding at the finale, but what romantic comedy doesn’t have one these days? Otherwise, Edward's a good guy, and him finally proposing to Elinor will have you smiling. When Willoughby’s nice guy act eventually crumbles, he still suffers tangible shame over his misdeeds. It’s hard to top, for many, what Alan Rickman did as Col. Brandon in 1995, but this version dragging out Willoughby for a duel is quite a surprise. It helps that Nordrum’s saturnine performance fits the character, especially when he outlines his tragic backstory to Marianne.

Amongst the supporting cast, none shine brighter than Mrs. Jennings, who can chat up a storm seemingly for hours. You’ll never grow tired of her, especially whenever she chimes in with worldly advice. Her pug, with whom she’s never without, is quite enjoyable too. Her son-in-law, Mr. Middleton (Turlough Convery), is also quite the character. Meanwhile, John is just a dolt, while Fanny is an unlikable dolt, both by design.

Speaking of designs, they’re certainly not lacking in sense. It opens with Marianne running through the countryside, filmed magnificently by Arnaud Potier and accentuated by Roger Goula’s sensible score. As it goes on, we’re treated to a succession of frames that could adorn an art museum. They’re also inhabited by the exquisite works of production designer Francesca Di Mottola and costume designer Grace Snell. And finally, let’s give a point to editor Izabella Curry, for that tense duel scene. 

Wrap it up, Jethro!

I can only pronounce this Sense and Sensibility to be a respectable movie. It's not overwhelmingly romantic, but it still possesses an amiable demeanor, exquisite visuals and a delightfully quirky supporting cast. As with Emma., it's sure to take a few viewings to understand its romantic entanglements. In this viewing, I was intrigued with the narrative similarities to its literary sibling, Pride and Prejudice. Then again, it's probably because it's the most thorough Austen book I've read.

What kind of thoughts will you have? Find out for yourself if you watch it now. 

Whalefall

 About five minutes, maybe less, into Whalefall, the projector suddenly dimmed then went to black as the sound still played. It quickly got fixed and reset, so all was right in the end. Unlike what happens to Jay Gardiner (Austin Abrams) here.

Jay is looking for his dad, Mitt (Josh Brolin), or what’s left of him. A year earlier, Mitt allowed the sea to take him rather than cancer. Their relationship was rough, but Jay figures this is the best way to get closure. Jay takes an hour of air and years of Mitt’s scuba diving lessons for his mission.

During the dive, Jay witnesses a sperm whale pursuing a squid. The petty cephalopod grabs Jay just it goes down the whale’s throat. Now, Jay has to get out of the belly of the beast before either his oxygen or luck runs out. That’s the gist of it.

Daniel Kraus, with director Brian Duffield, adapted his own novel for the screenplay. During which, Jay’s setbacks are accompanied by flashbacks to life with father. For some, they are too frequent, too dull and too many. For me, they’re pretty interesting in how they gradually plant the seeds of Jay’s salvation. Chances are that you’ll remember even the tiniest details by the time they come back for the climax. After the aforementioned fiasco, they were welcome proof that the projector still worked.

As with Resident Evil, Abrams’ performance makes the implausible scenario believable. Due to the whale’s toxic atmosphere, Jay is often forced to convey his physical and emotional pain through his respirator; he suffers a lot. He is so believable that, when he frantically cries out for his new “friend” and light-source, a Jelly Fish, to stay awake, it’s as moving as it is silly. That comes when he nearly escapes, with he even crying out to a tour boat that can’t hear him. It just makes his eventual escape and rescue all the more moving.

Jay’s complicated relationship with Mitt is well-acted, even if somewhat typical. What I found fascinating about Brolin’s performance was that, even at Mitt’s worse, there’s some tangible emotional pain. To his credit, Mitt shows off some of the goodness everyone keeps saying he has. Some of his best moments come when Jay imagines the whale speaking in his voice (yes, really). Still, it’s kind of weird that he wanted Jay to be his own man, but his taskmaster attitude contradicts it. But I digress.

John Ortiz, as Mitt’s buddy Hewey, is the only other prominent human cast member. The silent prologue, where Hewey breaks down during Mitt’s suicide, tells you everything about their relationship. We also get Elisabeth Shue as Mitt’s wife, Zara, and Jane Levy & Emily Rudd as daughters Eva & Nan, but they’re mostly sidelined by the plot. Now, who do we have behind the camera?

By far, the biggest technical star is production designer Ramsey Avery, who visualized the whale’s innards with very realistic sets. While the forestomach, where Jay spends most of his plight, is alluringly bio-luminescent, the gastric acid heavy fundic stomach is the stuff of nightmares (thankfully, we don’t tour the pyloric stomach). You’d think that what we see of the whale’s mouth is CGI, but nope, it’s another set! Cinematographer Aaron Morton really sells us on Jay’s claustrophobic plight, as well as the beauty of the ocean around him. The actual CGI, meanwhile, is excellent, as is the brutal makeup work.

It’s also an excellent movie to listen to. Its nautical soundscape, both within and without the whale, is spectacular. When Jay’s ears pop due to water pressure, the sound effects are perfectly sickening. Joseph Trapanese’s stirring score is a lot easier on the ears, even when things get dire. Its soundscape means nothing if they aren’t paired with its visuals. A black screen for 106 minutes is only half a movie. Unless it’s designed that way like Derek Jarmen’s Blue, but this is different.

Instead, you really should be thinking about 127 Hours. Over a decade ago, Danny Boyle made a compelling movie about a man pinned to a boulder. This year, Whalefall is a compelling movie about a man stuck in a whale. You can ignore the implausibility of it all thanks to its strong central performance and technical work. See it soon; hopefully, your screening will go smoother than mine.

Street Fighter

 Say what you want about Street Fighter, specifically the 1994 film with Jean-Claude Van Damme and Raul Julia, but I still find it corny fun. I enjoyed it as a kid and still enjoy it even now. Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li, on the other hand, was no fun at all.

So, what did I think about its third round in live-action? 

In its animated prologue set in 1987, Ryu (Andrew Koji) wins the self-explanatory World Warrior Tournament with the help of Dark Hadou, which is basically the Dark Side of the Martial Arts Force. Unfortunately, his sensei Gouken’s (Don Lee) literally demonic brother Akuma (Roman Reigns) comes looking for Ryu, but settles on fratricide. Ryu and his sworn brother, Ken (Noah Centineo) immediately part ways for different pursuits. Ryu takes up a ramen shop, while Ken becomes a celebrity fighter; neither of them are very good.

In 1993, Ryu and Ken are scouted by Chun-Li (Callina Liang) for the latest World Warrior Tournament. It’s actually a trap by her employer, M. Bison (David Dastmalchian), to extract Ryu’s power for himself. Ryu only joins when Ken does, specifically to keep Akuma off of Ken’s back. They have allies with a few of the fighters, plus Chun-Li, who’s really an Interpol spy with a score to settle with Bison.

Everybody got that? 

That’s pretty much it.

It’s a lot to take in for a simplistic plot. It also speeds through character motivations, dramatic points and even concepts in its two-hours. So, Bison wants Ryu’s power to fuel a new weapon, but we never see it (maybe it’s the super-laser in Alpha 3). Bison also killed Chun-Li’s dad, which is revealed relatively late. All the talk about “Dark Hadou” and the like mostly makes sense if you know the lore. The film just ends before these narrative punches properly land. 

For a film about a fighting tournament, it sidelines a lot of the tournament and its contestants. Characters like macho military man Guile (Cody Rhodes) and wrestler Zangief (Olivier Richters) only show off during a bar fight, while kickboxer Joe (Alexander Volkanovski) is just there. The tournament, save for Ken’s fights, just happens off-screen. Granted, the tournament was just an excuse plot in the games, but there was room for development here.

Is there anything good about it? Yes, and surprisingly enough, it’s Dan Hibiki (Andrew Schultz), Ken’s manager and other sworn brother. While seemingly a joke and a moocher, it quickly becomes clear that he really has Ken’s best interests in mind. He’s even willing to fight Akuma at the end, which gives him an A for effort. Meanwhile, we have Blanka (Jason Momoa), a green jungleman whose subplot is nearly perfect. Eric Andre, whose frequent collaborator Kitao Sakurai is the director, gets some good zingers in as the bombastic and petty announcer, Don Sauvage. And finally, we have Dhalsim (Vidyut Jammwal), Guile’s brother-in-stretchy-arms who’s the most fun character to watch in battle.

What about the more substantial characters? Ryu & Ken’s relationship is fine, even if it takes a while to understand their intricacies. Individually, their individual quests are pretty compelling. Ken earns his mettle when he finally throws his signature fireball, the flaming Hadouken, while Ryu earns his during a surprising revelation. Liang’s Chun-Li is a great straight-woman amidst the silliness; really, the only thing wrong is with the abrupt ending.

And now, for the villains. Dastmalchian’s subdued line-deliveries are rather interesting. It’s hard to top what Julia brought to Bison in the last months of his life, but Dastmalchian gives it a good effort. His minions, such as Cammy (Mel Jarnson), Juli (Rayna Vallandingham), Vega (Orville Peck) and Balrog (50 Cent), mostly standout during their fight scenes. Akuma, meanwhile, is mostly just a generic doomsday villain who, at least, knows how to make an entrance.

Street Fighter is very committed to replicating its source material. Its characters outlandish designs, special moves and even intricacies like throw-animations are present and accounted for. Even the intense techno score by Leo Birenberg & Zach Robinson incorporates the cast's classic themes rather well. The elaborate production design by Kevin Kavanaugh and stylish cinematography by Ken Seng are perfect for the craziness. The animated flashbacks by Titmouse have been compared to the 1994 anime film, Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie, but they look more like an Udon comic in motion. Either way, they're pretty neat.

Street Fighter is also too invested in its eventual sequel, hence the abrupt ending. Despite its unfocused abundance, it has enough bright spots for me to hope it gets it. Above all else, it was never boring. If you just want simple arcade action made real, then I think you'll get your quarters worth, and then some.

I've said enough.

The Social Reckoning

Man, The Social Network’s still the best movie about the internet! Who cares about The King’s Speech, am I right?

I can’t wait for The Social Network 2!

Fear not, Buck, for we now have its “spiritual companion,” The Social Reckoning. Aaron Sorkin writes, and this time, directs this continuation of Mark Zuckerberg’s (Jeremy Strong, tagging-in for Jessie Eisenberg) ultimate success story. This time, we’ll see how it’s everyone’s problem.

Huh?

In 2019, the computer illiterate Jeff Horwitz (Jeremy Allen White) becomes The Wall Street Journal’s newest tech reporter. Meanwhile, Frances Haugen (Mikey Madison) joins Facebook’s Civic Integrity Team, and is already at a crossroads. She discovers that Facebook’s algorithm is pushing users down rabbit holes full of extremism and misery. Her former friend, Kayleigh (Portia Doubleday) is case-in-point.

Jeff is assigned to cover Facebook’s activities and ends up meeting Frances. Despite her inside info - at great risk to her NDA - he needs concrete evidence before it goes to print. That happens during that pandemic, and thus, Horwitz starts publishing The Facebook Files.

Meanwhile, in 2021, Zuckerberg prepares to testify before Congress over Facebook’s influence. He prides himself a “free-speech absolutist,” until something forces him into an impossible choice. I’ll give you a hint: I started this film just as it happened.

Sorkin’s screenplay mostly takes a “just the facts” style of reporting. We’re told how Facebook’s algorithm contributed to extremism and cyber-bullying. But we rarely see it in action for ourselves. For example, Frances tells Jeff that Kayleigh used to be progressive, but there’s no before to her after. When we first see her, she intentionally loses the plot when two non-white officers, Deputies Diaz & Otumbo (Sierra Capri & Michael Braugher), try to help her during car trouble. She ends the movie having learned absolutely nothing, as does Facebook. While Frances is suspected by her supervisors, they barely pose any tangible threats. It’s much more tense when certain world events loom on the horizon.

Let’s get into the technicals now. The work by returning cinematographer Jeff Cronenweth and new composer Alexandre Desplat (tagging in for Reznor & Ross) is fine, but it’s not special either. Its most visually interesting aspect is the Facebook control room where Zuckerberg makes that choice. You can thank production designer Jon Hutman for that, along with his recreations of Facebook’s offices. Alan Baumgarten, taking over editing duties from Baxter & Wall, switches back-and-forth between Zuckerberg and Jeff/Frances’s storylines with a handy sliding timeline graphic. His best work comes when he builds up to a certain something…

Physically, Strong’s resemblance to Zuckerberg still has me double-take. Personality-wise, he’s nothing like the fascinating egomaniac in The Social Network. He’s mostly stiff and stoic when he talks business, free speech and the business in free speech. He gets his best moments when the fictionalized Charlie Garrigan (Bill Burr) gets under his skin. Their antagonistic history prints a picture I would have loved to see ages ago; I spent the movie wondering if he was someone I missed in The Social Network.

Did you think I was being mean when I called Jeff “computer illiterate?” In his first scene, he admits being unable to work his car’s GPS, much to his editors’ (Betty Gilpin’s Kris & Gbenga Akinnagbe’s Andy) exasperation. When he meets Frances, he admits being a “tech reporter…ish.” White does a good job making him a likable dork, who’s also a surprisingly tenacious reporter. He and Frances are enjoyable together, whether on the case or discussing movies. Alone, Frances coming out of her shell is engaging, as is her confrontation with Morgan (Anna Lambe), who turns out to be a fellow whistleblower. 

Anyone else? There’s also Raya (Wunmi Mosaku), Facebook's crisis manager, who spends the movie coaching Zuckerberg's testimony. Billy Magnussen is Teddy Marks, Facebook's media relations executive and the closest, but not quite, to a heavy. Kris is enjoyably quirky, and she gets her best scene when she exercises her editorial authority. Its most enjoyable supporting characters are Zach & Evelyn (Aidan Laprete & Kelly Pereira), Jeff’s computer-savvy interns. In many ways, their contributions cannot be understated.

Don't expect an instant classic with The Social Reckoning, and you'll be fine. There's plenty of engagement with White and Madison's performances, but not enough to like and reshare en masse. At most, I can comment that it's a "respectable enough movie." See it if you want; it's fine if you like it better than I did. I've got a packed weekend to get to...

...And send...

Boorman and the Devil

Boorman and the Devil premiered last year at the Venice International Film Festival last year, then debuted theatrically just this August and on home media in September. I was going to watch it on Amazon, but then I found it for free on Xfinity via TCM. That was lucky.

When The Exorcist debuted in 1973, its unprecedented success got everyone excited for a sequel. Everybody, that is, except for the folks who made the first one. The Bills - director Friedkin and author Blatty - weren’t up for it, and neither was Ellen Burstyn (Chris McNeil). Linda Blair (Regan) wasn’t excited, though she came aboard with stipulations. Now for the director …

John Boorman, who refused and detested the first film, was interested in William Goodhart’s intellectual screenplay (based on the writings of Pierre Teilhard). Boorman and his Creative Associate, Rospo Pallenberg were especially interested in making the first film’s “riposte.” Eventually, a whole bunch of stuff happened, and when the final product, Exorcist II: The Heretic, was finally released in June of 1977, everyone practically hated it. David Kittredge tells us all about it here.

What kind of anecdotes can you expect? Well, you can learn about how hard it was to work with Richard Burton (Father Lamont), whether at table reads or on set. Blair’s own problems aren’t alluded to here, other than her own tardiness. One crew member tells us how he helped maintain the hundreds of locusts used on-screen. You’ll also learn about Pallenberg’s contributions, like gender-swapping Dr. Gene Tuskin for Louise Fletcher (who is prominently posthumously featured), and reworking the ending when Boorman contracted valley fever. You’ll even learn about blind bidding, a process that The Heretic’s failure helped outlaw. These stories are illustrated with some neat graphics, some of which resemble storyboards.

It even elaborates on a famous anecdote. In 2013, Friedkin told an audience at the Chicago Film Critics Festival of how an angry audience chased a few Warner guys out of The Heretic’s first test screening ten minutes in. Chris Landers, who attended the screening as a boy, tells us that it was his slightly older friend, Dave, who pointed out the guys. It’s not only a fascinating revelation, but it makes it all the funnier (I’m sure no one was hurt). It’s also interesting, since going by the film, the scene where they lost it was sixteen minutes in. Anyway, incidents like that forced Boorman to rush out a re-cut, which didn’t help much.

What else can we learn about it? It mostly stuck to the Warner Bros backlot when its international shoot proved unfeasible. It’s fascinating to see how cinematographer William A. Fraker, who was Oscar-nominated that year for Looking for Mr. Goodbar and shortlisted for this one, matched the stage lighting with whatever they got on location. It’s equally interesting to see how the filmmakers pulled off their in-camera effects, including its mirror flashbacks. You’ll be impressed, and shaken, with how they filmed Regan nearly sleepwalking off a building - Warner’s New York offices! Boorman advises future filmmakers to “find a better job,” but I think they can learn a lot from The Heretic.

Ultimately, it functions as a good retrospective on Boorman’s career. Whether it’s his directorial debut - the Dave Clark Five vehicle Catch Us If You Can - or the bonkers Zardoz and yes, The Heretic, all of his films look visually stunning - some more than others. His reminiscences about his second film, Point Blank, are vitally educational for movie color design. You’ll see clips of them all throughout this documentary’s 112-minutes. The Heretic’s failure demoralized him and nearly obliterated his career, and he still has mixed feelings about it. Still, it’s heartening to know that he regained his standing with his next film, Excalibur, and mostly never lost it.

At the end, its talking heads can’t come to a consensus about The Heretic. An admirable effort for some, a dud for others, and a masterpiece for more. Boorman and the Devil invites you to come to your own conclusion. As for mine, I think it does a good job portraying The Heretic as fascinating a failure as David Lynch’s Dune. I’d rather watch The Heretic’s unintentional comedy than Believer ever again. You may disagree, but Boorman provides some vital context for The Heretic's shortcomings. Watch it and learn, that's what I think.

Digger

 Mr. Burns, a Post-Electric Play uses The Simpsons episode Cape Feare to show us how stories evolve over time, particularly in a post-apocalyptic world. Boots Riley (I Love Boosters) recently announced that he’s bringing it to the screen. Meanwhile, you can catch its closest thematic cousin, Alejandro G. Innaritu’s Digger, in theatres now.

Or, not. I've seen the numbers ...

Digger Rockwell (Tom Cruise) is the biggest oil man around. A methane leak at his Greenland field eventually causes a huge iceberg to break off. Unless somebody does something, the iceberg will slam into Norway and flood Europe with the resulting tidal waves. Digger, the ailing President Compson (John Goodman) and their advisors get to work futzing around. They consider some solutions, like blowing it up or praying on it melting, but they don’t work.

What I just described were scenes from Fossil Fools, a stage play that dramatizes Digger and co.’s incompetence. As the show rehearses its 25th anniversary performance, Curtis Markson, who’s playing Digger, has a lot on his mind. He argues with Hannah (Sophie Wilde), the director, over their interpretation of Digger. His daughter, Hope (Flora Higgins), has seemingly disappeared into a commonplace super hurricane. And did I mention the state of the world? The show must go on, somehow.

(And now you know why I brought up Mr. Burns.)

There’s no denying that Cruise goes all out as Digger Rockwell. He’s got a silly accent, some bouts of over-acting with bombastic speeches, and a dynamic makeup job supervised by Kazu Hiro. Thank goodness Fossil Fools gives his performance context; otherwise, it’s just there. I didn’t hate him, as others have, but I wasn’t laughing like crazy. The only time I kind of pitied him was when he spreads the ashes of his cat, Maggie, across the sea. Curtis Markson, on the other hand, is a much more compelling character with everything he’s facing. His story, at least, ends with something resembling hope (ha ha).

Did I find anything funny? The first thing I found funny was Dr. Nirav Ganesh (Riz Ahmed), Diggers’ top scientist, being drunk. Granted, he’s drowning his sorrows over the impending doomsday, but Ahmed’s clearly having fun here. Ganesh, as an aside, is the one who advocated hoping for the ice to melt, but he’s also one of the few truly likable characters in Fossil Fools. Goodman’s President Compson is a bombastic idiot, but even he gets points for shutting up his obnoxious Reverend (Stephen Wight). It also leads to the optimistic revelation that the famed “nuclear football” is a series of codes that some people have to, but might not want to, read.

Who else do we have in the cast? There’s Kenny (Jesse Plemmons), Digger’s nephew and the producer of Fossil Fools, who’s interesting in his moral ambiguities. His mother, Emma (Sandra Huller), is just there in Fossil Fools to yell at Digger. His assistant, Lina (Emma D’Arcy), gets even less to do. Danny Kirrane, whose Clarkson tries to warn Digger about the ice, makes the most of his limited screentime. Gen. Fitzgerald (Robert John Burke), Compson’s Military Chief of Staff, is practically Dr. Strangelove’s Buck Turgidson, but not as amusing. Compson’s Vice President Eddie (Michael Stuhlbarg) is just fine, I guess.

I’m a lot more positive on its technical style, though. Emmanuel Lubezki’s desaturated cinematography is just as appealing as the usual Wes Anderson film. He also provides some interesting oners, including the final shot, as well as some magnificent skies. Richard Johnson & Dennis Gassner’s gigantic production design, for both real and play worlds, is simply splendorous. A few choice locales include Digger’s mansion, the European parliament, and the actual theater itself. Amongst the in-universe visual effects, the most interesting is the mammoth rear projection system. The animatronic Maggie, ambient sounds and score by Cosmo Sheldrake, are all unsettling by design. They do their job too good at times.

Yes, I spoiled Digger’s big metafictional twist, but it shows up relatively early on. As I said before, it gives a lot of context to its 129-minutes of craziness. Some may see it as a self-important satire of satires, but there’s a good point about the power of escapism in there, too. As bleak as it is, it’s a bit more optimistic and tolerable than Don’t Look Up. You'll have a lot to think about if you check out this odd movie. As for me, I still have several more reviews to go this month. I've said enough about this one.

Primetime

Next week, the highly anticipated documentary You Can See Everything will make its theatrical debut. In the meantime, you can catch its co-director, Lance Oppenheim’s, narrative film debut Primetime. Here’s the scoop:

Chris Hansen (Robert Pattinson) is the host of Dateline NBC’s most popular segment, To Catch a Predator. Hansen, with the help of Xavier Von Erck (Matthew Maher) and his organization, Perverted-Justice, lures would-be offenders for an interview and their eventual arrest. They employ actors, such as Del Harvey (Phoebe Bridgers) and newcomer Dan Plum (Skyler Gisondo), to help lure them in.

The segment is so popular that Jeff Zucker (himself) moves it to primetime. Hansen decides to maximize his audience with a high-profile “white whale.” He and his team zero in on Murphy, Texas, where it seems they’ve found an offender of influence. The local police give them their support for what should be a watershed television moment…

…Luke Dittrich’s Equire article, which Ajon Singh adapted for the screenplay, gives us the result: Tonight on Dateline This Man Will Die.

Needless to say, this is a tough sit, which isn’t helped by cinematographer David Bolen’s work. He magnifies Hansen’s steel-eyed screen persona and erratic off-screen behavior with his analog-styled visuals and extreme close-ups. Hansen towers over many an offender, but is broken when one of them, a rabbi (Bob Ari), refuses to take it sitting. He starts cracking earlier when the National Enquirer snoops around his private life. Pattinson’s bits of overacting might have you wonder whether to laugh or squirm. But you’ll feel it when he quietly breaks down in the finale.

Casting directors Francine Maisler & Molly Rose, who both worked on Sinners, have assembled some shocking talent. Chances are that you won’t recognize Tony Revolori as the first offender; or Jonathan Lipnicki as the first offender Dan helps bust; or Anna Faris as Hansen’s wife Mary Joan. Creed Bratton, who played the same-named character on The Office, is creepy in his cameo as fan Jim Christian. Bill Heck’s short screen-time as Stone Phillips leaves a huge impression. And then, there’s the biggest casting surprise: Alex Winter, as the “white whale,” assistant district attorney Bill Conradt. This is the kind of ensemble the Casting Oscar was made to recognize, even by proxy.

While Hansen is at the film’s center, it equally revolves around “Decoy” Dan. He takes up the show to try to get his SAG card and gets more than he bargained for the second he walks on the set. His first segment is advertised with a comedic voice-over that’s just appalling in context (let’s just say you’ll want Hansen to show up immediately). Gisondo has a few great scenes; the first has him take up a moping Hansen’s job for one sting, while the other has him try to talk down Conradt.

Amongst the cast, we also have Merrit Wever as Hansen’s producer, Andie Bender, who almost considers leaving him for What Would You Do? She’s just as ambitious as Hansen but is more level-headed about it. Bokeem Woodbine, as Police Chief Cortland Gunn, provides another case of overacting when he discovers Conradt’s identity. And finally, there’s Eric Rahill, whose Troy provides some welcome comic relief.

What else can we talk about? You’ll almost feel bad for the offenders, from how they cower in Chris’s presence to the excessive police presence used on them (the offender that Dan interviews gets tased, despite being in crutches). Conradt is easily the most sympathetic of them, since he recognizes his moral shortcomings. Less sympathetic is a masked man who haunts Hansen’s nightmares; do you really want me to tell you the context? On the technical side, we have some exquisite work by editor Daniel Garber and composer Ari Balouzin. I’ve said enough.

This isn't a film for everyone. If you do decide to take a seat for Primetime, you'll be in for an unnerving yet captivating experience. If not, then perhaps I can interest you in a more appealing movie or two later this month. And believe me, this month is going to be packed. Onwards to the next review, I guess.

Forgotten Island

It’s almost October, so it’s time for one last review. It’s time I tell you about Forgotten Island before I forget about it.

In the Philippines, sometime in the 1990s, Jo Yuson and Raissa Molina meet when the former’s family history project goes awry. They instantly become besties and spend the next few years building matching friendship bracelets and listening to Jo’s Grandma, “Lola” Fatima’s (Dolly de Leon) stories of the mysterious island of Nakali. Fatima, Jo’s only local relative, dies by the time she (H.E.R.) and Raissa (Liza Soberano) graduate High School. But at least her bestie isn’t going anywhere ...

Except to CalTech. Which is not in the Philippines.

As they party away their last night together, Jo & Raissa find a sand dollar that takes them to Nakali. Once they realize where they are, it’s already been twelve hours, and things have already gotten strange. Raissa’s flight is imminent, and the sand dollar is missing. Fortunately, Raww the weredog (Dave Franco) agrees to be their island guide. He takes them around the island to meet, or rather, re-meet, such mythical characters as Batiba the Batibat (Jenny Slate), who collects memories; Bungi the Tiyanak (Manny Jacinto); Mermahn the Kataw (Kevin Mccann); and Datu of the Kapre (Jo Koy). 

And then, there’s Manananggal, Jo’s favorite creature in all of Filipino mythology. Manang (Lea Salonga), as she goes by, is a vampiric creature who splits into two. She’s constantly furious, which isn’t helped by Raissa stealing her sentient wings for herself. She doesn’t plan to let our heroines escape alive. Their friendship is also tested once they learn what really happened last night. I think that’s it.

Joel Crawford, who previously did Puss in Boots: The Last Wish, direct and wrote it with his friend, Januel Mercado (who was a co-director in the other film; there’s a difference between that and director). Crawford’s kids also pop up in the cast - Kailey is young Jo, while Zoe & Riley are her nemesis, Reynaldo, through the years. I should also note that Kayla Teruel is young Raissa. Anyway, what can you expect from this film?

For starters, you can expect one hyperactive movie. Barely any minute goes by without some visual craziness, even before Jo & Raissa set foot on Nakali. It mostly comes from its anime aesthetics, wild takes and 2D art shifts (notably during some unreliable flashbacks). There's even a bit of live action when our heroines watch Predator. It's visually creative, and quite overwhelming, at the same time. Granted, the hyperactivity fits our youthful protagonists, but it's not for everyone. By comparison, Raissa mind-melding with Jo during the climax shows creative restraint. And now, I gotta answer some questions…

You can also expect an excellent friendship. Jo & Raissa hit it off once they formally meet outside their principal’s office. Afterwards, they never stop being enjoyable together, even when things get dour. Late in the film, there’s a big reveal concerning Jo that turns Raissa against her. While Raissa is right to be upset, Jo’s desperation helps us sympathize with her. Raissa saving Jo from the depths of despair during their mind-meld is quite moving. Overall, our heroines’ chemistry is enlivened by both sets of voice actresses.

How about a decent supporting cast? It’s topped off by Mermahn, who’s a bit of a dullard, and Bungi, who’s surprisingly tolerable. King Truffle Wuffle (Ronny Chieng) of the Duwende is a cuddly little nuisance who thinks he’s a legitimate threat. They all help save the day, so they’re all right. They’re good reasons to look up information on their actual myths; you’d be surprised how cuddly the Duwende really aren't, for example.

And others! Raww’s “full dog” episodes, and imperfect reverts, provide some more visual craziness. He never acts like a third-wheel or something with our heroines. In fact, he fits right in with them. As with Jo, his major secret does little to dissuade audience sympathy. Batiba being the secret villain, much like Slate’s previous role as Bellweather in Zootopia, was a legitimate surprise. She even acts more malicious than Manang, if that’s possible.

What about our obvious villain? Manang sparsely talks, or roars, but what sticks out is her being described as an echo-chamber of negativity. You can certainly believe it, for she’s almost never happy. The animators go above and beyond to make her the embodiment of rage. You’ll almost feel bad for her, even if you don’t get the full story.

What else do we have? Nakali is visualized with a striking painted CGI style, much like that of The Last Wish. The creature designs are all interesting, even if they lend themselves to some overlong jokes (Mermahn, anyone?). Its real world provides a neat insight into life in the Philippines. The soundtrack is a great mixtape of classic tunes, including the obvious Don’t You (Forget About Me), and Nathan Matthew David’s score.

I'm willing to go back to Forgotten Island once it hits home media. Yes, it's centered on a great friendship, but I want to make sure nothing got past me the first time. If visual craziness suits your speed, buckle up for a great adventure. If it gets you interested afterwards, even a little bit, in looking up Filippino mythology, then it's doing right. Whatever the case, don't you forget about it.

I've said enough.

Heart of the Beast

 Before we get into the belly of the beast with next month’s Whalefall, how about we get to the Heart of the Beast? 

Meet Command Sgt. Maj. James Belmont (Brad Pitt) and his combat dog, Odin the German Shepherd, both retired. They’re out to get away from it all in Alaska; both have PTSD - Odin, especially. Belmont has an inconvenient heart attack while flying, and their plane crashes in a lake. They start trekking 58-miles to the nearest road, but nature isn’t that accommodating. That’s basically it.

Yeah, the screenplay by Cameron Alexander (normally a music video director), is that straight-forward. It actually opens up with Odin at his destination, where he’s found by a great Samaritan named Amber (Anna Lambe). In the main story, Belmont & Odin just trek through the wilderness, which was actually filmed in New Zealand. After the crash, they encounter a bear, a perilous tree bridge, and a pack of wolves. It gets a bit esoteric when the northern lights put in an appearance, but that’s about it. Overall, it gets its main job done well.

While Odin is credited as himself at the top of the credits, they later admit that he’s four dogs in one. Uber, a retired rescue dog, is the main one, while his sons Seeka, Ryker and Hondo are his stunt doubles. You can hardly tell the differences between them. He sells his scenes with many a weary look, such as the one he uses to drive off the bear. The cold open hardly diminishes the peril, which starts with him getting tossed from the plane. You’ll definitely feel for him in the home stretch. He’s just a good boy all the way through.

Belmont, meanwhile, keeps everyone at arm’s length. He’s extra-cautious with Watkins (J.K. Simmons), an old-timer who pops up for a scene. Belmont opens up enough to tell Watkins about his and Odin’s combat life. We also learn later that he has no family, but that’s it. None of his late unit stands out during the hazy PTSD-flashbacks. He sports “that calm, stern look,” to quote Watkins, for most of the film. He and Odin have a great relationship; individually, though, I was more invested in “Odie.”

Whether it’s the Alaska or New Zealand wilderness, cinematographer Mauro Fiore captures some splendid sights. As with the multiple lead dogs, I didn’t see anything amiss with the location filming. An intense sound-mix accentuates both the aforementioned flashbacks and the natural world (especially the wolves). The obviously digital animals didn’t detract from the intensity of their scenes. The wolves’ first scene, where they attacked a mama moose & calf, was quite unsettling. Odin’s titanium fangs and amputated leg were perhaps the film’s best effects. And finally, let's not forget Jared Michael Fry's emotional score, but then again, you couldn't forget it if you tried.

Despite its sparse story, there's a lot of Heart in this Beast. Chances are that you'll fall for its newcomer dog stars as much as their veteran human co-star. Their combined performance gives us one of the most memorable modern screen canines. You have to see them in action for yourself, anywhere and anyhow. I think I've said enough.

Resident Evil

 As I said before, I didn't watch any of the Resident Evil movies besides the third one, Resident Evil: Extinction. I guess it just wasn't for me. That was, until Zach Cregger followed up Weapons with the franchise's eighth film. Let's see how he does it.

Bryan (Austin Abrams) is a medical courier who, just after one job, is immediately given another. He just needs to drop off a package at an Umbrella Corporation lab in Raccoon City. It pays double, which is especially convenient since he's about to become a dad. He just needs to drive in the dead of winter and avoid any trouble ...

He soon realizes that there are monsters in these parts, such as an elderly farm couple (Andrea Miltnerová & Karel Dobrý) and their malinois. These ostensible zombies don't die when you shoot them in the head; they like to merge into tentacled things instead. Bryan is forced to go to Raccoon City on foot, where he hopes to end the night alive and human. It's not going to end well.

Just five years after Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City poorly melded the first two games’ stories together, Cregger & co-writer Shay Haten take the side-story approach for this reboot. There are no familiar character names, just a few aesthetic choices. During its 94-minutes, there’s a monster in every corner, Bryan never has allies for long, and he makes some easily preventable mistakes (and it’s a miracle that he survives a few). The tension never ceases as Bryan gets into one mishap after another, until its bleak & abrupt ending. Its approach has been compared to Mad Max: Fury Road for a good reason.

It wouldn’t work if Bryan wasn’t likable, which he is. Abrams plays him as well-meaning idiot whose biggest sin is “open mouth, insert foot.” I won’t deny that he’s insensitive to his now-pregnant girlfriend, Michelle (Sara Paxton, who’s only heard on his phone), but him helping the (unknown to him) zombie woman shows potential. His mistakes, such as shooting his own car, are believable cases of bad luck, rather than obstinate stupidity. I probably can’t say much about the ending, but Abrams delivers some of his best acting when Bryan realizes his situation is beyond hopeless.

Who else do we have here? Johnno Wilson, as a Sheriff who shares his last name, is reasonably strict with Bryan, who inadvertently dooms him by making him take the zombie woman. A poignant scene has Bryan encounter an infected girl (Isla McRae), who plays a major part in the bleak ending. Paul Walter Hauser & Kali Reis show up as Paul & Maxine, two Umbrella personnel who take Bryan into Raccoon City. He’s funny, while she’s super-cool, so of course they don’t last very long. And finally, we have the Umbrella Scientists, led by Zach Cherry’s Carl, where Bryan’s quest ends. They seem like a fun bunch, but their own intolerable stupidity pops up once things go horribly wrong.

One of the film's greatest decisions was to hire cinematographer Dariusz Wolski. His visual choices elevate some of its most horrific scenes into works of art. There's Bryan's snowy drive, which is only illuminated by his headlights, and is downright ominous when his taillights come on. There's also a random fat zombie that Bryan meets in the sewers, illuminated in moonlight. And then, we have a maternity ward illuminated in blood red for horrific reasons. If the Academy was willing and able, then Wolski could easily have his second Oscar-nomination here. He's accompanied by some excellent work from production designer Tom Hammock, editor Joe Murphy and composers Hays & Ryan Holladay, all of whom worked on Weapons.

Now, what can we expect from the monsters? You can expect zombies visualized with impressive makeup work, along with a few mutants with seamless CGI augmentations. The monstrous reveals provide a few great jump scares. You can also expect some imaginative monster designs, especially the aforementioned tentacled thing, The Pile. It was visualized with some impressive motion capture work, which involved harnessing a group of acrobats together. The Fat Zombie, meanwhile, is an equally heavy and realistic puppet. Its best boss battles, more or less, come from the divebombing zombies and the acidic Puker, the latter of whom impedes Bryan's elevator ride. 

Although Resident Evil isn't obviously based on the games, its narrative of unfortunate events is suitable for one. As Bryan gets to work, one can sense what it must be like to play these games without a guide. They can also get a few good laughs as Bryan's genre-savviness gets thwarted by reality (driving through locked fences doesn't work!). Once the ending hits, they can wonder about what game favorites like Leon Kennedy and Jill Valentine would expect. Video Games have been tricky to adapt into movies, but Resident Evil might hold some clues in its narrative DNA. You'll just have to find them for yourself.

Expect my next review to have at least a few more STARS!

Shaun the Sheep: The Beast of Mossy Bottom

 Who’s ready to get sheepish again?

Shaun the Sheep has another movie, which might mean another Oscar-nomination for Aardman given both his and his parent franchise, Wallace and Gromit’s, track-record. Let’s see what happens when he meets The Beast of Mossy Bottom.

This time, it’s almost Halloween, and Shaun and his flock are growing pumpkins. When their Farmer accidentally destroys their patch, Shaun upsizes a new one with some Home-Made Science he learned from a convenient book. Meanwhile, the Farmer wants to ask the local Vet out to the upcoming Halloween Hoedown. But first, he decides to do something with his thinning hairline. Unfortunately, he ends up taking Shaun’s growth formula by mistake.

Said growth formula won’t stop working, as the flock finds out. Meanwhile, it turns the Farmer into the titular “Beast.” The Vet mistakes him for Bigfoot, and she decides to “send him home” to Bigfoot Island. The townspeople want to kill him because they have nothing else better to do. Bitzer the dog thinks that the “beast” ate his master. Shaun and the flock set out to fix everything before somebody gets really hurt. That’s the whole movie!

At 81-miunutes, there’s not a whole lot of fluff. I went in thinking that the "Beast’s" identity would be a major twist. But the film drops that pretense once it establishes Shaun’s formula and the Farmer’s hairline. Compare that to Curse of the Were-Rabbit, which is six minutes longer, where it takes a while to figure out that monster’s secret. It’s disappointing to anyone looking for a deep mystery. But it won’t disappoint anyone looking for silliness in the slightest. Amongst its gags, we have an original twist on a Psycho shower parody that I won't spoil. It's all capped off by a few great set-pieces, one of which involves a giant pumpkin.

Once again, its plot is communicated with grunts and grumbles. But this time, I’ll introduce the most relevant actors - Justin Fletcher vocalizes Shaun and his cousin, Timmy; John Sparkes doubles-up the Farmer and Bitzer; and Nina Sosanya is the Vet. The whole cast, even the mean townsfolks, is an entertaining lot. Shaun's Mad Scientist act is a whole lot of fun. The Farmer and the Vet’s relationship is especially charming. While Bitzer is so entertainingly wrong about the "Beast," you can't help but feel for him just the same. In short, everyone's lively personalities prove that Aardman's animation excellence is alive and well.

Its family-friendly thrills are paired nicely with Natalie Holt's score. A particular highlight, for me, is the "Beast's" theme, whose imposing music is paired with sparse, and bombastic, lyrics. Its visual effects, not just the animation, are quite spectacular. Overall, there's a whole lot to see and not a lot of time to do so in The Beast of Mossy Bottom, and not just because it's so short. Hurry up and do so before it gets crowded-out; there's no guarantee it will stream on time for Halloween! I've said enough.

Practical Magic 2

 Oh yeah, Practical Magic! Isn’t it that one movie where Nicole Kidman and Sandra Bullock were witches?

Yeah, Baxter, that’s the one.

That’s a movie that happened!

It sure was. And like the best of them, it found its biggest audience on home video. Eventually, Alice Hoffman supplemented the world she started with her original novel with two prequels and a sequel, The Book of Magic. It’s from that sequel that we now have Practical Magic 2. 

Can you give me a primer?

Okay, so we have the Owens's - sisters Sally & Gillian (Bullock & Kidman), their aunts Jet & Franny (Dianne Wiest & Stockard Channing), and Sally’s daughters Kylie & Antonia (Joey King & Maisie Williams, tagging in for Evan Rachel Wood & Alexandra Artrip). Their witch ancestor, Maria, cursed her lineage with untimely deaths for any man they fell in love with. That includes Sally’s two husbands, the second of whom was Aidan Quinn’s Gary from the first film. After that tragedy, Sally magics away her daughters’ memories of magic, so they can live normally.

Years later, Jet passes away on her own birthday. Kylie brings along her boyfriend, Gideon (Xolo Maridueña), to the wake (uh oh). The curse eventually strikes Gideon and leaves him comatose. A heartbroken Kylie flies off to London with some magical tomes, which tell her how to reverse the curse. But since they’re evil tomes, Sally & Gillian fly off after her before things get messier. That’s kind of it.

There’s also some business with Tom Bailey (Solly McLeod), a handsome guy Kylie meets along the way. He’s the film’s secret, and practically unnecessary, big bad. His backstory’s disconnected from the family curse, even if it’s actually tied to the family. Yeah, he’s taking advantage of a bad situation, but that’s two plotlines rushing through the same small door. He’s so nothing that Gillian & Sally carry on a conversation in the middle of his villain monologue! He did have a neat final battle, so there’s that.

I haven’t seen the first film, but I imagine that part of the reason for its enduring popularity is its lively cast. If that’s what you love about it, then you’ll be happy to know that it hasn’t changed. It’s fun to watch all three Owens generations hang out with each other and amongst themselves. Jet, in particular, is such a lively character that her early death is the film’s biggest disappointment. Franny mostly spends time with Antonia, Gideon’s nurse, while the others have their plot; they’re fine together. Gillian & Sally and Kylie & Antonia’s sisterhoods, with their silliness and bonding, are especially appealing. Kylie, by herself, has the most compelling plotline, with the second going to her mother’s (even with some forced drama).

And who do we have to thank for this drama? We have returning screenwriter Akiva Goldsman, this time with Georgia Pritchett & Kelly Marcel, along with new director Susanne Bier (In A Better World, Denmark’s Foreign Language Oscar winner for 2010). That’s who.

What else do we have? The only significant character I haven’t mentioned yet is Dr. Ian Wright (Lee Pace), a magic professor who teams up with Gillian & Sally (who falls for him). They’re fun together, and he’s fun by himself. And while Jet died too early, it’s still nice to see the town come together to support the Owens afterwards (they were pariahs in the first film). Said town, which was called Maria’s Island in the first film, makes use of some nice location filming around England (tagging in for Coupeville). The Owens Estate, both interior and exterior wise, is the most appealing locale. The various displays of magic utilize some neat visual & sound effects. And finally, the soundtrack makes good use of both easy-listening songs and Rupert Gregson-Williams’ magical score.

You know, I hope that there isn't a Practical Magic 3. It's not because I hate Practical Magic 2, but because I think the Owens - both present and future generations - deserve a happy ending. If there is one, it shouldn't have the curse pull a fast one on them right at the start. As for this installment, you needn't worry if you haven't watched the first film; its exposition is that airtight. It's a bit overlong at 130-minutes, and has a few chronological & logical issues, but its cast makes it easy to forget these flaws. There's no harm in watching it, so go for it. 

The Uprising

 Paul Greengrass’s historical drama, The Uprising, doesn’t waste any time getting started. 

I won’t either.

It’s 1381. The Black Death is still in living memory, and the Hundred-Year’s War is still going on. The young King Richard II (Woody Norman) and his councilors need more money. So, they decide to tax the already strained peasants even more. It’s either that, or tax the merchants, and everyone knows they want representation (that’s basically their justification!).

A humble Ploughman (Andrew Garfield), who lost his family in the plague, starts a riot, which leads to the historical Peasants’ Revolt. Ploughman marches with the peasants to London, where they hope they can petition the King to be nicer to them. Needless to say, their faith in him is mostly misplaced. That’s pretty much it.

“I am what I do,” Ploughman says. And he doesn’t do much. He spends time with Richard and his mother, Joan of Kent (Katherine Waterston), so there’s something. But he mostly just goes with the crowd and only steps out to be their spokesman or fight. He’s barely able to do anything when the crowd gets out of hand midway through. We barely get to know him during the film’s arduous 127-minutes; there isn’t even a flashback to his family, whom he says haunts him. The best I can say about him is that he’s just fine.

It gets silly when it turns out that Mr. Plow is actually Robin Hood, or whoever inspired the legend (the poem Piers Plowman, the earliest surviving mention of Mr. Hood, was written during this time). It comes out of nowhere in the epilogue, and it just ends after an awkward last shot. It’s a waste of the film’s most vibrant costumes, specifically those for the pseudo-Merry Men. This was briefly subtitled as “The Rise of Robin Hood,” but a more appropriate moniker is “Surprise! Here’s Robin Hood!”

There’s barely a discernible face in the crowd, other than the revolt’s historical leaders Wat Tyler (Cosmo Jarvis) and John Ball (Jamie Bell), and even then I had a hard time remembering who was who. It’s kind of hard to care about them when the King double-crosses them and nearly slaughters them to the man. Alyce (Thomasin McKenzie), a former nun, is probably the most compelling face. While the King’s pivot to full evil is jarring, there’s no denying that Norman goes all out in the role. His evil council, meanwhile, is just there. But the best role in the film belongs to Sky Yang, as the King’s kind-hearted scribe.

So, did anything else work in this film? The cinematography by Pål Ulvik Rokseth can’t sit still to save its life, but it is appropriately bleak. More impressively, though, are its massive crowd shots; it’s hard to tell if any of those extras are digital. The editing by William Goldenberg sells us on the nightmarishness of the London riots. Unfortunately, it doesn’t dwell on any of its unintended victims, of which there are likely many. So, there goes the sympathy. But at least Volker Bertelmann’s intense score sets the mood quite effectively.

I know I complained a bit about Greengrass's The Lost Bus for its slow first act, but its unrelenting thrills more than made up for that. The Uprising, meanwhile, rushes through its history, and it also takes a while to get there. Strangely, its admirable story and resonant themes kept my attention more often than not. It just needed a much better execution for them. You can check it out if you want. Maybe you'll have a better time in its narrative Sherwood Forest.

I've said enough.

By Any Means

 Do you want me to review this fall’s first Oscar-bait drama?

Yes, By Any Means necessary …

Ha, you said the title! I’ll do it, but don’t hate me afterwards …

Okay …

It’s 1966, and Vernon Dahmer (Giancarlo Esposito), the Forest County Chapter President of the NAACP, is helping Black Americans register to vote. The Klan doesn’t take kindly to his efforts and firebombs his house one night. Dahmer gets his family out, but he doesn’t make it. Wayne Strider (Yahya Abdul-Mateen II), an FBI agent and old friend of Dahmer’s, gets on the case.

His superiors, Special Agents Moore & Rhodes (David Strathairn & Josh Lucas), partner him with their special informant, Gregory Scarpa (Mark Wahlberg). Scarpa, a mafia Capo, was introduced in the prologue beating a confession out of a suspect in the 1964 murders of Chaney, Goodman & Schwerner. The FBI wants Strider to let Scarpa do his thing to solve this murder, too. Naturally, the two “partners” disagree on how to do things down south. But they’ll pull it off in the end, right?

For this cinematic assignment, director Elegance Bratton is paired with a screenplay by Sascha Penn. It’s not a subtle screenplay, considering its odious villains and brutal violence. Yeah, I know, how would anyone make the Klan and their sympathizers sympathetic? But Scarpa’s methods on most of their witnesses lose their luster after a while. For most of the movie, he keeps espousing to Strider about how good violence is. I’m not sure if it’s cathartic or horrific when Strider executes a bad guy near the end.

Let’s talk more about Scarpa. He doesn’t take it well when he’s assigned to the case, but why? He most certainly isn’t ashamed of the violence he’s done. Does he not want to leave his family? Maybe, but he has a mistress when Strider meets him. Maybe he just doesn’t like working for the feds? It doesn’t do a good job delving into his background, including how he took to Malcolm X’s teachings (which provide the film its title). He and Strider have decent chemistry, but Scarpa shooting a barking dog threatens to disintegrate the audience’s goodwill towards him. Yes, I know that the real-life Scarpa wasn’t a nice man, by any means, but the film Scarpa is a little flat.

Meanwhile, Strider is much more tangible a character. He tells Scarpa about the time he successfully retaliated against a racist cop, which is more backstory than what Scarpa gives. Other than that, he’s got good chemistry with his wife, Allison (Nicole Beharie), and struggles not to give into violence. It takes the murder of a witness, Rebecca Brewer (LisaGay Hamilton), to push him that far. But I’ve been thinking; Strider is a fictional composite character of several actual FBI agents, and he has more depth than a character based on a real-life man. Shouldn’t they both be equal?

What about the supporting cast? LaChanze is likable as Dahmer’s widow, Hattie. Esposito makes the most of his limited screentime as Dahmer, especially during his last stand. Dahmer’s assassins, led by Sam Bowers (Ethan Embry), are evil as they can be, but I didn’t find them the worst around. That title belongs to the racist cops who refuse to accept Strider’s FBI credentials (one of whom is shot dead by Scarpa). Strathairn, as usual, makes for a good moral authority figure. Lucas, meanwhile, is just there.

Mississippi Burning, which dealt with the 1964 murders, won an Oscar for cinematographer Peter Biziou. Ante Cheng’s intense orange hued imagery for this film ought to get him shortlisted, at least. It’s warm, but not inviting, especially when it’s used with Scarpa’s tortures. The attack on the Dahmers is perfectly harrowing, though the decision to briefly pivot to first-person POV as if it was Doom is a bizarre one. Wahlberg is kind of unrecognizable as Scarpa, thanks to a rather interesting makeup job. Terence Blanchard’s appropriately moody score ought to get it on the Oscar-shortlist in a few months.

I’ll bet that it already has an Oscar-nomination in the bag: its title song sung by David Kushner & The Isley Brothers was written by Diane Warren. I don’t see it breaking her losing streak; it’s good, but not great. Still, I’d be open to her winning at least once, whenever …

Anyway, should you watch By Any Means? Yeah, if you want to, particularly if you’re looking to check an item off the upcoming Oscar checklist. It's an odd movie, to say the least, but it's not a boring one. It's all for violence, but the torture scenes never outstay whatever welcome they had (unlike some other movies). It's probably worth comparing to Mississippi Burning, whose fictional Agent Monk (Badja Djola) was loosely inspired by Scarpa. You've got plenty of time before the Oscars, so you can watch it whenever.

I think I've said enough.

Coyote vs. Acme

 At long last, a cinematic masterpiece shelved forever is shelved no more…

The Day the Clown Cried?

I mean, another cinematic masterpiece shelved forever …

The Director’s Cut of The Magnificent Ambersons?

No, not that one, a modern cinematic masterpiece…

Empires of the Deep! I wonder who got that guy to pay up …

No, no, not those cinematic masterpieces, a more modern cinematic…

Batgirl! I knew there was a hero at Warner Bros. …

Actually, you’re on the right track, it’s not that but Coyote vs. Acme.

Oh…

And now, the review:

After so many attempts to bag that Road Runner, Wile E. Coyote has had enough. He decides to take the ACME Corporation, the manufacturers of his faulty gadgets, to court. Representing him are Kevin Avery (Will Forte), an Albuquerque lawyer, and his niece/intern, Paige (Lana Condor). Opposing them are ACME CEO Foghorn Leghorn (Eric Bauza, along with most of the Tunes) and his fixer, Buddy Crane (John Cena). It’s a tall order for Kevin and his firm, who have only tried and won small cases. 

As trial day approaches, Kevin and Wile E. try to get the Road Runner on the stand. They also become privy to something called “Project Sisyphus,” which ruffles Foghorn’s feathers. In fact, Foghorn’s so ruffled that he sends a mercenary (the identity is a surprise) after our heroes. It all comes to ahead when the case gets the attention of the Senate. That’s pretty much it.

Another Part of the Review

While the Looney Tunes, as a brand, hardly needs any introduction except - perhaps - to their under-appreciative corporate overlords, Samy Burch’s screenplay directly adapts Ian Frazier’s 1990 New Yorker article Coyote V Acme. That took the form of a transcript of said trial’s opening statement, whose main points are covered here. What does that mean on-screen?

As visualized by director David Green, the screenplay has fun placing its cartoon characters in a courtroom drama/legal thriller. It doesn’t bother to hide that Kevin’s mysterious informant is Bugs Bunny; “That’s All Folks!” is used as a threat; and Dr. Peter Lorre (as in, the Tune version of the actor) is a whistle-blower. Kevin is used to settling “cartoon accidents” much like real-world car accidents, even if he settles for peanuts. Luis Guzman, as the trial judge, tells the court he’s not here for silliness, while he wields a cartoon gavel. Overall, its seriousness is its best joke, and its greatest asset.

What do I mean by that? Well, remember when I said the film covers the articles main points? Those come with Wile E.’s psychological examination. It has a clear answer for why he’d keep using ACME’s products despite their incompetence (to wit, what choice does he have?). He doesn’t speak, but you’ll understand how badly he has it. Its most moving moment comes when Road Runner actually takes the stand and admits that Wile E. is still a friend. Though, that raises a lot of questions about Road Runner that it doesn’t want to answer (“Maybe he likes the chase?” for one).

Forte and Condor are pretty likable as the Averys, while Tone Bell & Martha Kelly are fine as their legal partners, Sal Maltese & Dottie Jones (yes, those last names are allusions to past creatives). Cena’s exuberant performance as Buddy Crane lends further proof to wrestlers making for great comedic actors. But seriously, he may be a bad guy, but he still shows some bits of decency. This iteration of Foghorn Leghorn is his most insidious one, which he best displays when he divulges Project Sisyphus. His disregard for his consumers really sells it. He’s not quite as villainous as Judge Doom in Who Framed Roger Rabbit, but he’s still a mean bird. 

What Do We Have Here?

The cartoon characters, animated by DNEG, are all CGI cel-shaded characters. They look like classic Tunes, feel like classic Tunes, but their frame rate is smooth. It’s an odd disconnect, but maybe it’s just me. That aside, the animation and integration work is done rather well. You’ll never doubt that the Tunes and humans belong together. The action pieces, which include Dr. Lorre’s attempted escape and Wile E.’s latest chase, are phenomenal. They’re paired nicely with Steven Price’s score, whose best work is actually his rendition of the 1812 Overture. You’ll need to see it to believe it.

Was it Worth It?

I say, I say, it certainly was worth it. While Who Framed Roger Rabbit is still the gold-standard of animated hybrid-movies, Coyote vs Acme's sincerity helps it come close. It's a funny movie, but you'll still sympathize with the Looney Tunes' perennial loser. Its most admirable trait is that it exists at all. It's worth seeing once, not just in theaters, but on all aspects of home media. What else can I say but ....

That's All Folks!

The Magic Faraway Tree

 The Magic Faraway Tree, the film of Enid Blyton’s book series, premiered in the UK back in March, and locally as of this weekend. Let’s just get to it.

Meet the Thompsons. Tim (Andrew Garfield) dreams of a lucrative homemade pasta sauce business, while Polly (Claire Foy) has just invented a smart fridge. Their three kids - Beth (Delilah Bennett-Cardy), Joe (Phoenix Laroche), and Fran (Billie Gadsdon) - are really addicted to their tech. Polly’s employers add spy cameras to her smart fridge, so she quits. Tim promptly moves the family out to farm country, where he hopes to make his dreams come true. The farmer (writer Simon Farnaby) whose barn they’re renting warns them not to go into the woods.

Fran goes into the woods anyway, where she encounters the titular tree. There, she encounters various fair folks, such as Silky (Nicola Couglan); Moonface (Nonso Anozie); Saucepan Man (Dustin Demri-Burns); and Mr. Watzisname (Oliver Chris). Every day, the fae and their guests can climb their big ladder to a random, wondrous world. It could be The Land of Goodies one day, The Land of Birthdays the next. Fran’s siblings join her on the next visit.

Unfortunately, Beth, in her impatience, gets her cold-hearted grandma (Jennifer Saunders) breathing down her parents’ necks. Then, she accidentally wishes for her dad’s crops to go bad. Perhaps one of the other worlds can help her make it right. That’s pretty much it.

I never actually read the novels, nor watched their TV adaptation Enchanted Lands in the 1990s. But from what I’ve been told, some of the books’ concepts wouldn’t fly today. Case in point is Dame Snap (Rebecca Ferguson), a sadistic teacher who originally debuted as Dame Slap, a change she laments. It is what it is, I guess. There’s a more pressing issue related to her, though, which is her role.

Snap is set up as the film’s magical big bad, much like He Who Must Not Be Named. She’s petty, childish, and absolutely bonkers thanks to Ferguson’s performance. Just wait until you hear her menacingly sing Teddy Bear’s Picnic; she doesn’t want anyone to laugh at it, but what did she expect? So, what’s the problem with her? She shows up during the last twenty minutes and is another thing that happens instead of the thing. Two sequels have already been greenlit, so maybe she should - nay, she should - show up for a larger role.

The phrase “things happen” describes much of the plot. Throughout it, Fran is nearly arrested for “being greedy” in The Land of Goodies, Mr. Oom Boom Boom (Mark Heap) tries to sell Silky to Santa (who never appears), and Joe flies a magic bus that can fall asleep. The film is mostly too light for these perils to hit their mark. It’s not all frivolous, though, when Beth enters the Land of Birthdays (that’s where she makes her wish). It’s pretty clear this was made for kids, and they might take to some of its crudest humor better than their parents.

Speaking of parents, Garfield and Foy are likable enough as Tim and Polly. Their kids, whose tech addiction is played to satirical levels, take a while to endear themselves to the audience. Beth and Joe fuss around, while Fran is selectively mute for reasons. It’s a bit much, but they get better once they start their magical adventures. Admittedly, Fran didn’t need much character development, but Beth’s progression is the strongest of the trio. 

Much like Ferguson, the actors playing the Fair Folks go full pantomime in their roles. Moonface, in particular, thinks highly of himself, and Anozie playing up his ego is pretty fun. He gets a surprisingly moment of tenderness later on, though that requires me to reveal Tim’s secret. I can reveal, however, that Mr. Watzisname is surprisingly entertaining, while the Angry Pixie (Hiran Abeysekera) is just there. A few more notable folks include the Know-it-Alls (Simon Russell Beale, Lenny Henry and Michael Palin), a policeman in the Land of Goodies (Michael Dapaah) and a group of Birthday elves. Their broad acting is reflected rather well by their costumes (designed by Ann Maskrey), worlds (Alexandra Walker) and makeup designs (Karen Hartley).

The Magic Faraway Tree is just an easy time at the movies. It looks nice, feels nice, and plays nice. It's a decent movie, don't get me wrong, but it didn't entirely sell me on its esteemed books. I am, however, curious about its sequels, just in case they move along better than this one. See this installment if you're curious; I said enough about it.